12 Types Of Students You Will Find During Night Classes

The following are the different categories of people you will meet in night classes in our various higher institution.

1. Customer care agents: this category of people will keep on receiving calls from the time the came to class till the sleep off. If you sit beside them "sorry" and it is more among ladies.

2. The lookers: this category of people will make sure that they look at any slightest
movement around them. If they ever see a
beautiful/handsome girl/guy then they will
never cease catching a glimpse at her/him.
You will even wonder if these people actually came to study or to observe others study.

3. The late comers: this is common among girls. When you get to class from 4-7pm, you
will discover that the class is empty. They are
waiting till 9:30 when their presence will be
noticed.

4. The preachers: I am sure this set of people
annoy every reader in that class but nobody
could pick the courage to rebuke them because nobody wants to be tagged enemy of God' word. The worst part is that these preachers come to preach when they are tired of reading and want to stretch themselves.

5. The itinerant readers: they are people who move in and out of the reading room every ten minutes. Sometimes you see them walking about the corridors. In an extreme cases they can read in four to six classes in a night.

6. The unarmed robbers: yes i call them unarmed because they look very innocent when
they are reading beside you waiting for the operation time. The steal things like phones,
reading lamp, purse/wallet, laptops, wrist-
watches, textbooks etc depending on the
person's level of expertise and stealing
intentions.

7. The chronic sleepers: Hmmm, this set of
people will just enter the class and lay their
face on the desk and sleep off. They will not
open their book from the time they came in till the time they left. They are always victims of the category of people above. The bad thing about these set of people is that the snore
without regards and they fart without conscience.

8. The ash-crammers: they are our first
classers, they will start reading from the time
they came in till dawn. Sometimes i wonder
what they will be doing during the day.

9. The eaters: they will buy biscuit, viju milk,
lacasera, gala, infact all the
snacks in the world just to attend night class.

You will wonder if you are in nursery class or university night class.

10. The pingers: this set of people will never
let their phones be. Some will even come with
up to three phones. Pressing their phone every
now and then that you will wonder if they are
actually studying or proof-reading.

11. The toasters: if i mention everything
without mentioning our guys and babes who
come to night class to look for partners then
my list is incomplete. This is for people who
are single and searching every night.

12. The last of it all is the couples: they will
come to class together, continue talking,
chatting and touching each other until they are
tired then off they go. They have gone to night
class.

Written by @Sunexx360
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The Countdown To The 2014 Edition Of Mark-D-Ball Continues

2014 has been a good year in sports & Music.

Come see your favourite sports stars, Music Stars, Comedians and Actors at the 2014 edition of Mark-D-Ball - Africa's Biggest Basketball party.

The new Mark-D-Ball Nigerian Breweries Village will be opened for fun lovers 24/7
26th to 31st of Dec. 2014
Live in Otukpo aka Texas.

Everything is BIG in Texas remember?
Book your flight and hotel today.

For more on our tour guides in Otukpo
Please call: 08111111471
Or ping: 2AF57428
You can also follow us on twitter
@markdball2014
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MTN Subscribers: How To Subscribe To Merry Merry Christmas Tune

It is another time of the year when we make parties and merriment.

As part of the celebration, MTN is offering her customers the 'Merry Merry' caller tune.

To get Merry Merry Christmas tune, text "710020" and send to "4100"

Happy yuletide celebration
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MTN Customer: Get Diagnosed Without Physically Seeing A Doctor

Mobile Telecommunication giant, MTN Nigeria, is offering subscribers the platform to seek medical doctor's assistance without booking an appointment with them.

Do you have any Medical Issue? Get Personal on your Mobile Phone and GIST-A-Doctor.

To begin the consultation with the doctor, text "Dr" and send to "35242.

The service costs N100 monthly. So, what are you waiting?
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A Dissection Of The Value Of MTN Goody-Bag By Edesiri

1. Text 'GB750' to '131' and you get over 170mins to make calls.

2. Text 'GB1000' to '131' and you get over 220mins to make calls.

This is one of the reasons why the rich get richer. The rich get discount on whatever they buy or spend.

Now, compare the above tariff to when you buy a recharge card of N1000 to make calls or N750 to make calls as well; the maximum minutes you may get from them is: 100mins for N1000, and 75mins for N750.

Let us spend wisely...Register for the Goody-Bag.
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Five Categories Of People You Meet When Purchasing Seasoned Meat (Suya)

I went to buy Suya this evening at a junction along my street. I saw many guys and babes waiting for their turn to be served Suya by the Northerner. I noticed the following kinds of people:

1. 'Give me test' Northerner

These persons take seriously in collecting a small piece of Suya from the seller. They hardly know that it is part of their own suya they are eating.

2. 'Put More Onions'

These persons are onions addict, they like onions. They will tell, the Northerner to make sure that more onions are added to their suya.

3. 'Northerner Put Jara'

These class of people like to be given something more to what they paid for. They do not mind if they buy only N50.00 worth of suya.?

4. 'People Who come to Smell the Suya.'

These are the "long throat " class. They follow friends to just feel the smell of the suya, in some cases, they are the ones that will shout "Northerner the suya too small "

5. 'The Big Boys'

They come usually remain in their cars and order the Northerner to put suya worth N2000.00 in five places and that means many people have to wait for a long time.

Please add your experiences
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The Ten Problems In Nigerian That APC Will Resolve By Hon. Otobrise

1- Insecurity :General Buhari's military experience will serve here to tackle the situation.

2- Education: Professor Osibanjo's educational experience will come into play to render solution and promote education.

3- Religiously: Both Muslims and Christians feels safe as Pastor Osibanjo, the VP and Muhammad Buhari combination solved that.

4- Corruption: Mr. Integrity (Gen. Buhari) is enough here and former Attorney General Pastor Osibanjo, knows the ways of law better.

5- Justice: Professor of Law Prof. Osibanjo must contribute a lot.

6- Employment: Remember the former PTF chairman Gen. Buhari...the Catalyst of all good and quality projects.

7- Chad & Cameroon Attacks: Recall the one and only Military man (Gen. Buhari) that serves them right in those days. Where Prof. of Osibanjo knows how to talked them out legally.

8- Oil Theft & Mismanagement: These cannot be happening while the person (Buhari) that built most of the refineries will be there In charge.

9- Unity: Muslim + Christian, Northerner + Southerner, Buhari + Osibanjo,

10- Human Rights: Prof. of law Osibanjo knows that better

Hon Engr. Otobrise John Omamuyovwi writes from Abraka, Ethiope East Local Government Area, Delta State.
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2015: Time To Vote Out Jonathan And Vote In Buhari By Ayo Ajogun

For how long are we going to forgive President Jonathan for telling CNN that power failure is a thing of the past in Nigeria when we know better? For his inability to recover our missing but precious girls? For his inability to bring those who stole our subsidy fund to book?

How can we continue to tolerate the president Jonathan PDP led administration for using the police to intimidate opposition? For promising to invest the fund recovered from the removal of subsidy on refineries, as he had promised but failing to do so? For failing to order any investigation on the Stella Oduah's scandal; for retaining a minister who said an oil cabal "tied" their hands as the reason for the removal of oil subsidy?

How can we continue to suffer in this country when the presidency is yet to recover $10.9 billion oil money?

So, For failing, as the Commander-in-Chief of Nigeria's armed forces, to deal decisively with the insurgents; for failing to bring a SINGLE looter of our commonwealth to book; for paying so much for the protection of our pipelines yet having the worst case of oil theft ever, let us all work together to vote out Jonathan and vote in General Buhari (rtd).

I expect all Redeemed Christian Church of God and all Christians and Muslims who truly desire change to vote and support General Buhari & Pastor Prof. Yemi Osinbajo (A pastor of RCCG) come february 14th 2015 General election.

Support APC, Support Change. In God we trust and God Bless Nigeria.

Full Article Here...http://talkafrica.co/ng/p/12777/2015-time-to-vote-out-jonathan-and-vote-in-buhari-by-ayo-ajo
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Buhari Told Me To Be His Vice But I Turned Him Down, Says Tinubu

One of the key men that played a pivotal role in the founding of the All Progress Congress, Bola Tinubu, has revealed that he turned down the opportunity to be the running mate of APC presidential candidate in the 2015 general elections, General Muhammadu Buhari (rtd).

He made this shocking revelation on Wednesday in Abuja after the party announced Prof. Yemi Osinbajo as the vice presidential candidate of the party.

He said, "There came a time during the course of the events when our Presidential candidate, General Muhammadu Buhari, offered me the Vice Presidential slot.  Being a normal human being, I was deeply moved and honoured that he would consider me for the position. Being a patriot, I had to weigh my potential candidacy in all of its dimensions.

"I have concluded that the interest of the party, our campaign and that of the nation are better served if I retain my position as the National leader of the APC, allowing me to be a bridge builder across all divides.


Reference: http://www.punchng.com/news/tinubu-pledges-to-support-buhari-osinbajo/
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Joke: Just A Drop Of The Red Portion Will Make You Young

Bayo and his wife Ola received a letter from their daughter who went to study modern physics overseas.

SHE WROTE:
"My beloved Parents, I miss you so much and it breaks my heart to think that by the time I return, you will be too old. So, I am sending to you a bottle of a red portion that I made; it will make you young."

"This will help you to remain almost same age as i left you. All you have to do, upon receiving the red portion, will be to take only a drop. Good Bye, I love you all. Your daughter, Sandra."

After Sandra's parents read the message, they followed the instruction of the content. Her dad looked at her mum and said: you go first. So the mum drank, thereafter the dad drank as well. Indeed, the wife became younger.

After several years had passed, Sandra returned home to find her mother young & pretty, carrying a baby on her back. The mother gave her testimony of how the portion transformed her and equally made her very young.

The daughter was happy and asked after her father. Your Father? Hmmm!!!, said the mother. The mum continued: "your father was so jealous that I was so young and beautiful, that he drank the whole bottle." Whaaaat, replied the daughter. So where is he?" replied her daughter. Hmmm, he is the one on my back..........

If you enjoyed the above joke, kindly share with your friends! Thanks!!!

Visit: http://talkafrica.co/ng/p/12750/joke-take-a-drop-of-the-red-portion-and-remain-young
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